i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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