DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
