so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize