And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
