one might say we're banned from that church
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
