I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
North Korea, Best Korea!
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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