So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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