Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I love how my cats smell like pot.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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