Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
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