I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
