the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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