actually, I'm a sock model
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone shattered a urinal.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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