she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
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you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
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I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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