I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
