If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
