just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
