Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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