So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
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