The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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