KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize
