If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
