do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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