I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
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