Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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