on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
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We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
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THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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