There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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