btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
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