i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize