can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
