Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
