I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
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It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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