I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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