i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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