why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Randomize
