did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
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