ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize