I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Randomize
