Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
