Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You dont lie about slip and slides
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
And then the night went full on bisexual.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
