My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
my poor anus
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
