Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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