We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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