hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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