He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
