I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
