How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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