): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
