i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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