Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize
