ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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