While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
